Family Conversations Should Include Estate Planning

Estate planning can be a tough topic because it requires coming to terms with mortality.  Additionally, one’s personal estate planning decisions may upset some heirs.  Despite this, a New York Times article from yesterday suggests the following advantages of estate planning conversations between parents and their adult children:

• Children may be more likely to accept a parent’s planned distribution of property if they hear the motive behind the distribution directly from the parent.
• Children and parents may have good ideas and opinions that help each other improve their estate plans.
• Talking about one’s own estate plan around one’s parents can be a minimially intrusive way to make the parents think about the need to plan for themselves.
• Talking about a personal estate plan allows parents to control how their children learn about their decisions: everything at once or a little at a time; in a one-on-one conversation or in a family conference.  

Ultimately, “[h]ow families handle delicate issues depends both on the particular circumstances and the personalities involved,” but having estate planning conversations “can help avoid surprises, lead to better financial planning and promote family harmony.”  Deborah L. Jacobs, Estate Planning as a Conversation, NY Times, March 3, 2010.