Keeping Money in the Family

Jeanne Fleming and Leonard Schwarz write about the intersection of money, personal relationships, and ethics. One of their readers inherited money from her father. Her brother inherited the other half. Since the reader doesn’t have any children, her brother expects her to leave her money to his children. However, she’s not very fond of her nephews and asked Jeanne and Leonard for advice.

They responded that she should follow her father’s intent, which may be discovered by re-reading his will. The reader feels like her father would want the money to stay in the family, but if the will doesn’t expressly say that, she has considerable latitude in deciding where she wants the money to go. They further responded, “Given the indifference of your nephews, we’d say you’ve been off the hook for quite a while. But if you want to be certain, here’s a test: Ask yourself whether, if you lived near your nephews, you could count on them to look after you in the final years of your life. We don’t mean a quid pro quo arrangement in which you promise them an inheritance in exchange for their assistance. We’re asking simply, would they automatically expect to help care for their aunt as she grew old? If the answer to that question is anything short of “absolutely,” then they and their father have no business expecting you to leave them your money. Family loyalty is a two-way street, not a one-way obligation.”

Jeanne Fleming and Leonard Schwarz, Who Gets Dad’s Money?, Forbes, Nov. 8, 2010.

Special thanks to Jim Hillhouse (WealthCounsel) for bringing this to my attention.